I’m not entirely sure why I’m a skeptic but I definitely am, especially when it comes to Church. I’m a very visually judgmental person (even though you will never notice it, and you wouldn’t think it.) and I know that is a bad thing. I also have a tendancy to think that people are what they appear to be, and I know that is wrong as well.

Although I find Church strange in the fact that the same Bible verses are referenced a million time in the span of only half my life time, it would appear there are more than a million different ways to look at something. Believe me I know what the right frame of mind can do for any sermon, and I know what the wrong frame of mind can do as well.

So as I sat there I pulled out my pins and began to draw a few doodles while listening, and as I listened I thought about a few things.

Here they are… I scribbled these down in Church as they came into my head…

Stories for us that we’ve never done or seen, but examples for us to think about. To pretend that we would give up our first born to trust God. Metaphors for life and examples, yet every time the same concepts with a new wrapper… Not always… It’s like a bag of different kinds of candy.

Will I really move mountains?
Will I really have the voice of even the Apostles?
To do what we can to break the Mold…What will we do?
I don’t like the Mold I feel like we stand in.
Is there something different coming?…different in the sense of social structure, something bad.
Is this Mold being built to make us weak?

Make no mistake, I don’t say these things because I’m new believer. I don’t say these things because I’m loosing my faith. I don’t say these things because I want an answer from you. these are rhetorical ‘?’s… But questions all the same, and when I find my answers I think things will be different.

I’m Glad to be an American, but I’m not entirely sure I’m Proud to be an American. Of course I’m not sure if I’m proud to much of anything. I know this is a topic that has probably been completely over done so wont get into much detail over my position.

I’ve always thought that being proud to be an American was something that the WWII generation may have felt, or maybe the Reagan administration promoted.

Every time I think about the flag for more than 30sec I think about this piece of art by Jasper Johns. I think about objectivity and thousands of people standing in perfect lines with their hands over their hearts with some lame song playing in the background.

I suppose that I’m proud America is an enabling country. People come here because they are able to live.

On the other side of the coin, I’m not sure what our country does that pisses off the rest of the world. Things I might not be so proud of. (consumerism, fast food, ignorance, and the A-Bomb…)

Dictionary.com says of –> Proud

It’s the 4th of July and it’s kinda raining out side. I’m beginning to wonder, do fire works still go boom in the rain?

A couple of things that I was thinking about last night were Money, America, Capitalism and what if I became Rich… Basically the independence of America has lead to Capitalism and the pursuit of happiness. In the end it seem Money helps.

On the drive back from Nashville Brody and I went through the rich parts of town and looked at some huge houses. I began to wonder what I would do if I became Rich.

Here is my thought…

If I became Rich due to my own work ethic and from the sweat of my brow what would I become? Basically, would I have a huge house with lots of stuff, a nice car, furniture, pictures on the walls and shoes that said, “I paid for these bitches with my die hard American spirit”.

I’m a simple person, I’ve never really had much to speak of and I don’t have any claim to fame. People always told me when I was a kid that some day I’ll get older and I’ll stop wearing clothes that have stains. So far I’ve managed to beat the odds, than again I’m not married or even dating at this point.

I’d like to think if I did become rich you wouldn’t know it. I’ll admit there are a lot of things I’ve always wanted that cost a lot of money, but every time I go to a house where people have obviously spent a shit load of money I feel a little weird. Like I should take my shoes off when I go in side, or how many toys does one person need. Or, are your employee’s doing this well?

Back to the 4th of July… Have fun, be safe and I hope it doesn’t rain on you or me…

Time flies by and we seem to be sitting in the middle of a movie watching things happen. Some times it’s almost like there’s a song going on in the background, but I can’t hear it. Some one is playing a montagh of my life.

Summer is actually here,,, the 4th is this weekend, and I’ve been in TN for 3 weeks or so. It’s crazy how time goes by, but I guess it more of the fact that things happen as time goes by. Some days I just wake up and look back on all the things that have happened in the most recent spot of my life and wonder about it.

It’s been one of those mornings. I just realized that its July 2nd and I was thinking about July months ago, and I was wondering what I would be doing and where I would be.

The Last Three Months…

• I did something I’v never done —>>> Rode a Scooter on a Main Road.
• I Traveled the Farthest East I’ve ever been since I was 4yrs old.
• Learned more about PHP than I’ve ever known.
• Met 7 or so Bloggers in person… One of the coolest things, if you get a chance to meet someone you read or reads about you try not to chicken out.
• I’ve gone to Church more time in the last three weeks than I did in the last 3yrs…
• I’ve realized that Suburbia is very weird…

Anyone, with any major accomplishments,,,??? for some reason the people with new borns kept coming into my head. I’ve been thinking, “I bet those people look back on their last three months in amazment, now it’s just baby poop…” Good luck to the new parents out there.

Here are the two I can think of.
1) Visual Trademark 2) Daniel Renstrom

I was thinking about a few things this morning as I was having my cup of coffee. There are a few things that define me that are good and bad. Here is what I was thinking…

• Musically inclined, but not Musically interested.
• Self reliant
• Anal about specifics.
• Distracted
• Day Dreaming
• I tend to pace
• Workaholic
• Creative
• Irritable
• Judgmental
• A little shy
• A little odd
• Cant Spell
• Slow Reader
• Bad Vision
• Slightly Dyslectic
• Prone to a temper
• Creature of Habit
• the list could go on…..

This is Kristin, there are a lot of things I could say. Basically Kristen is cool, I think Brody nailed it right on the head when he married this girl. They are perfect for each other.

Yes I realize I spelled Kristin wrong…

I’ll keep this short and sweet cause it’s weird writing nice things about your best friends wife.

From what I’ve seen over the last week I am blown away at how much of a great mom and a wife Kristin is. Not to say I was expecting less, I’ve just been away for so long. I was Brody’s best man and I’ve known both of them for a long time, and now all of a sudden there’s a family. Thing is last time I really hung out with both of them there was only one kid, and now there’s 3.

Kristin you’re doing an awesome job. Don’t let this post weird you out…

Do you Enjoy your daily routine? I realized lately that I might actually enjoy my work a little too much right now.

What’s that you say? Yeah that’s right, sometime I enjoy work to much. Sometimes I look forward to Monday when it’s Saturday, because Monday means I don’t have to make excuses to work on my projects.

Don’t get me wrong it’s not always cheese cake and fairies around here, there are time where I would love to drop kick my computer. (that would seriously hurt my foot though) But not today.

Is your Work fun?
Or does it suck?

be honest lets hear it…

First things First, the Church service was normal. Nothing out of the ordinary. I heard a few “yall’s” and few other things that made me chuckle. I think since I lived in on West Coast for so long I’m just used to hearing a lot of different accents but nothing over the top.

Here is a little something I wrote about why southern accents crack me up…

After Church I grabbed my back pack and took a ride on the Scooter…

This things so much fun, but at the same time it’s a little intimidating. Not because of the raw power, but because of the people behind you looking at you as if to say, “I could squash you like a bug”.

I’m sure there not saying that…

Today was one of those typical work days of theme building and updates. Not much to speak of, but I did find a mole running around outside.

I was just hangen out side for a few minute when I saw this little guy run across the grass. So I went over and blocked him so he couldn’t get away. I ran inside and got Brody and we coaxed him into a sand bucket, then he started to freak out and flop around. We felt bad, so we let him go. Moles are weird little guys.

Don’t for get to head over to arewestillcool @9pm est

Not sure if you read anything from Fee, but we’re currently working on a new layout and some new ideas to get them going a little better.

To day was a productive day.

I made it over to Auburn Grace Brethren this morning and saw a lot of people that I haven’t seen in a really long time. It was fun, but there were a few of those times where I was talking to someone I knew but just couldn’t place them. Eventually I figured it out with no harm and no one was the wiser.

I always find it amazing how you can leave a town for a couple of years and when you come back babies are now toddlers and toddlers are now kids and the kids are now in high school. I know it’s nothing new, but I’m finally getting to that age where I can see how old I am by the size of my friends kids. In fact I even said it a few time, “I remember when you were only this tall“. The kid just looks at me with that confused coy look as if to say, “I don’t remember you at all“.

Church was good, I haven’t been to a Church service in over 4 years, at least not that I can remember. Phil Sparling is the pastor. He used to be my youth pastor when I was 14 or so. He’s a really cool guy and not your average pastor in my opinion. I’m not sure why he’s not average but he’s not. I think it’s because he seems real.

After Church I headed out to lunch with some good friends and we all had Mexican food. Oh, how I love good Mexican food. Brody’s parents bought me a burrito and it was good. It was good to see them, thanks Barb and Mike I had a good time.

So if you are ever visiting the Auburn, Ca area and you’re looking for a Church to visit be sure to stop by Auburn Grace Brethren. You wont be disappointed.